All good points Evan. I appreciate the feedback. Please don’t hesitate to write.

If you really are the client, I’d say fine - whatever you like best is the way it should be. But I’m assuming this is something you plan to show to other people as a sample of your work - that means the real client is your audience. That’s the perspective I’m coming from.

You’re right - your other work shows you know how to edit. I’d say this commercial doesn’t - at least from the perspective of making a cohesive, polished piece. If you really wanted to be daring with this piece then you should have been more daring with the story, with the shoot, with the action, essentially with the rest of the production. Then the faster editing might have been appropriate. Now you’ve got straightforward action which is composed and shot fairly traditionally - in fact I’d say your editing is in fact pretty traditional, just not paced well. It’s not outside the box, it’s not daring, it’s just awkward. It doesn’t need theory-based cuts, it needs cuts that fit the rest of the content. Something like ‘Dream Chasers’ shows off your editing chops nicely - this commercial seems more like a ‘total package’ production example, and the editing distracts from the rest rather than bringing it all together.

But that’s just my take on it, and I’m just some random guy looking for reasons to procrastinate a little longer rather than get back to my own work. So don’t mind me - I’m not looking to start an editing debate, just sharing my perspective…

The real editing on this spot reflected what I chose not to show, or rather, the shots I chose not to use. I understand what you’re saying about the pace in reflection of the panic - but really what you’re suggesting is way too theory based for this production - (and ultimately less appealing in my eyes).

Also remember too that for this spot - I’m also the client. I’m trying to pimp my talents as much as tell a story. For any client / producer sitting in the screening room, I would have (and did actually cut) four more slightly different versions of this spot.

So in a sense, if you’re saying that for your taste, “I should have followed the rules a bit more,” well, I hope it’s obvious that yes, I CAN MAKE CORRECTIONS TO IT how the client desires.

BUT, since I’m reppn’ myself here, I thought it was more important to show some latitude, rather that show-off what anyone could read out of an Editing-101 book.

Of course, that doesn’t mean that stuff in Editing-101 is wrong, just that I think it’s pretty obvious throughout all of my work that I know how to edit. In the end, if this were a real gig, I’d be hired for technical and artistic skills, and for this particular spot I wanted to be as daring as I could. I feel it’s my job many times to push boundaries for the client - take ‘em to the edge of what they really wanted, what they’ve expressed to me - and then allow them to reel me back in if what I’ve done is a bit unsettling.

Because again, it’s easy to come back from outside the box. Anyone can make theory based cuts.

–
Oh yeah. And of the five versions I cut (some faster, some slower), this just happened to be the one I liked the best.

–
Keep writing - thanks brother.

You’ve inspired me to do something similar. A spec commercial I mean.

Thanks again Josh.

Pat